An exodus is soon to hit the lowlands. Dutch people will be fleeing this flat little country en-masse over the next few weeks. And trust me, this won’t be like any evacuation you’ve ever seen before – Dutch people will all be exiting in a very peculiar, yet strikingly similar, manner. They will be leaving at precisely 6:30pm on a Friday (after dinner, of course) and will all hit the highways via car or caravan at the same time, stocked full of ample supplies (think tents, sleeping bags, deck chairs, toilet paper, potatoes, hagelslag, and drop).
What on earth is happening? And where are these thousands of Dutch people headed? Well my friends – it‘s VAKANTIE TIJD!!
Yes, Dutch people vacation in a practically identical fashion: Caravan? check! Tents? check! Dutch flag? check! Potatoes, hagelslag, cheese, kruiden bolletjes? Check, check, check and check!! Of course you are wondering why the Dutch need to bring their own food (or toilet paper) on vacation – well, you can’t expect there to be good food in the top-culinary locales of the world can you??? I am going to assume that it must be their fear of not getting a decent meal (or wipe) abroad – as it couldn’t possibly be due to their infamous….err….
Not only is their mode of transport and sense of taste similar, but Dutch people all head to THE SAME holiday destinations. If you’re Dutch and planning your vacation you must pick either France, Germany or Spain (but don’t you dare try to combine the three!)
Now, I see you shaking your heads, thinking “Well, some Dutch do this, but NOT all of us!” Well folks, this year it is estimated that nearly 4 million Dutch people will pack up their tents and take the highly exotic camping vacation described above. That is a hell of a lot of caravans —and trust me, the local Dutch Albert Hein’s will be busy before they leave!
Headed that way too? You’ll be sure to spot the Dutch in the campgrounds by the abundance of blond-haired blue-eyed children running wildly. Campfires will be lit, and the occasion patriot folk-tune will be belted out. And you are sure not to miss the familiar Dutch flag flying from the caravan roof. God forbid they ever be confused for a bunch of Germans!!!